Oh What Love. Matthew 18.

Read Matthew 18 online here.

In just a couple of days we’ll be celebrating the birth of our Savior. The One who came to reconcile man to God. What a celebration it should be!

Yet, for some of us, Christmas is bitter-sweet—and I’m not talking about the candy or yams that were cooked too long. For some, this is the one time of year where we endure with the people whom we have successfully avoided for an entire year. Maybe it’s the family member who is always saying the wrong things at the wrong times. Maybe it’s the one who seems to enjoy inflicting pain on others. Whatever the reason is, there are hurts and troubles that bubble to the surface on Christmas.

In our celebration of the One who came for reconciliation, it’s important for us to remember how important reconciliation and forgiveness is in our own lives. Matthew 18 reminds us that, as the children of a just Father, we have the responsibility to forgive and reconcile. For the Christian, forgiveness is a non-negotiable. Sometimes it’s painful to do, isn’t it?

Forgiveness is about the elimination of a debt owed. For nearly 5 years I had successfully avoided a family member. He had said some extremely hurtful things about our family and there was an overwhelming sense of mistrust toward him. He would always call around the holidays and, in a failed attempt to fix things, would heap even more unfounded accusations on top of the existing ones. I was well aware of the parable of the unmerciful servant that we find in Matthew 18:23–35, so I knew that, as a Christian, there was no option other than forgiveness. I had concluded that since, after all, forgiveness has to do with debt, he did not owe me a thing. I didn’t want anything from him. Not an apology, not an admission of guilt, nothing; just stay away from my family and we’ll all be good. I had forgiven him! Well, sort of…

While it was true that I had forgiven him in the very literal sense of the word, I was not as familiar with the preceding passage in Matthew 18—the reconciliation part (A Brother Who Sins Against You in verses 15–22). See, for me, forgiveness seems easy. Reconciliation, however, not so much.

Jesus came so we could have forgiveness of sins, but what was the purpose of that forgiveness? You guessed it; reconciliation. Giving forgiveness is meant to lead to reconciliation just as asking for forgiveness is meant to lead to repentance.

To make a long story short, one year ago in 2007, I had some difficult conversations with this family member. He asked for forgiveness and so did I—because there were some things which I could have handled better along the way as well. I didn’t feel like he owed me anything, but hearing “I need your forgiveness” brought me to tears. We had reconciliation, which feels as though you’ve just peered into the heart of God and understood, for a moment, the complex architecture of love.

So, this Christmas, experience reconciliation. As you gather together with family and friends, reminding each other of the birth of our Savior, let us not forget why He came. Say the words, offer the hand, shed the tears, but touch the heart. Oh what love!

Today's article written by Bill Johnson.